Resolve

I woke up this morning, my phone was out of battery, so the alarm never rang

But somehow my body remembered to wake up

Is it the work of the subconcious mind ?

I got a pretty decent rest... I think I slept about... 6 hours +

Not really enough, since I didn't sleep well the past few days.

But it was better than the previous days =)

I woke up, it seemed like a pretty nice day to me ^^

I sms-ed my friend, that i'll be coming a bit late... haha~!

Everyone seems to say I'm always late XD for some reason~~~~ COME ONNNN, ITS MORNINGGGGG~!!! sunday morning XD so lazy

My niece couldn't come, she wasn't feeling well. Oh well pui ting~!!! next timeeeee =)))

Had breakfast, fetched him and off we were to climb.

There is this..... 6c grade top rope route

Well, im at my best a 6b climber, and i've been at that level for a pretty long time... I realized

So anyhow, 6c is harder than my current level

I was tired from bouldering, and doing a few endurance routes, but I did that route anyway

Why? Because I have to do something harder than my current level to improve

But there is a risk of course

Injury

Climbing that route.... it's about..... 12-14 meters tall, i would sayyyy, three stories? in height

But I tell you, I fell, I don't know... more than 30 times on that route

I think it's around there. Matt lost count.

There are, 3 hard parts in that route.

The 1st part was this heel hook, and a slightly long reach to this sloper. I fell about... 5 times, before I manage to pull it off.

The second part... The move was, to swing your body from THAT sloper to this side pull, it was a longer reach than the previous one

I think I fell.... 8 times... around there, before I got it right.

The third part. Was the hardest. I would say it was the crux (hardest part of the route)

I fell maybe 15-20 times on this part. Or more. I was trying to do it for around 30 mins. Just that part. This was wear Matt lost count rofl. Or did he lose count a longgg time ago?

I kept persisting. I was probably in no condition to continue the route to the end. But I kept doing it, despite feeling discouraged

The move is from this pincher hold to another pincher hold, and finally a cross hand to ANOTHER pincher hold. (pinchers are holds where you hold it in a pinching kind of way)

Soooo, imagine your fingers.... There are 3 sections separated by lines right? Only the top section, where you finger tips are, will be allowed space on pincher holds (usually)

And this was the case for all 3 pincher holds =/

I kept falling. And falling. And falling.

My the top section of my fingers, kept slipping, no matter how hard I tried to hold on. It was frustfrating.

But everytime I felt like coming down, I felt... It'd be such a waste if I don't finish it

I kept reminding myself of that. Again. And again. And again. I should give it my all.

No matter what

So I ended up in that same spot for about 30 mins + , just trying to get past that area.

I was discouraged. I did finish the route before, but today I couldn't

Maybe my body was too tired from the last few days. Or I didn't rest enough, or maybe today just wasn't a good day for me

But I just couldn't get past those 3 pinches. The crux.

My fingers were pretty worn out. Could not feel any strength left in them, but I still kept trying

Why?

Why go through that? When you know its not possible anymore? When you know that it's just a waste of time? And everyone is looking at you falling over and over?

Resolve.

It was to train. My resolve.

Mentally. I am still, weak. I know.

I don't have full control over my emotions yet. And Emotions are the downfall of most people in this world.

My resolve. Is still weak. How can someone like me possibly? Change the world someday? I'm. So weak.

I have to keep pressing on, eventhough I know, its hopeless, eventhough I know, it's impossible.
In my current state for my body.

I don't want to be weak. I have to be strong. Not just physically but mentally.

It's an aspect of life we often overlook. Over simple reasons we give up. Over small things we tend to feel that it's a big problem, and there's no way to solve it, so instead of thinking of a solution we just sit and worry most of the times.

There were times, where I nearly got it, but my hands had no more strength to hold on. It was.... frustfrating for sure, but I kept trying.

Did you know?

Most people, when climbing, they are afraid to fall. Not just the fear of heights or anything. But more of, the fear of failing.

"ahhhh, damn, I FELL!!! SHIT!!! DAMN!! I'm so pathetic. AND I NEARLY FINISHED IT!!!"

You know that's the feeling most people get.

I have been through that phase too. Not wanting to fall, especially on easy routes

But I realized

The journey to the top of a route is not a straight way up

The journey consists of falls

Falls, that teach you, and make you stronger.

Yes.

Every fall, brings you closer to the top, than you really think =)

A route that makes you fall will be your teacher, and help you improve yourself, rather than a route that is easily done, barely teaches you anything new, except perhaps to maintain your current form.

So what if you fell, 10, 20, 100, or even 1000 times?

The greatest climbers are the ones who fell the most. Believe me.

Because they keep challenging routes, that make them fall. Over and over agian.

And each time, they get up, over and over again, prepared to push their limits, to the fullest.

It's because of that, that they become so strong, that they no longer fall on most routes.

They are looking for routes that challenge themselves. In other words, routes that make them fall. Think about it.

That was why I was so stagnant in my climbing for such a long time, with barely any improvement. I was afraid to try harder things and push myself. Partly because my body gets injured easily, but it's no excuse

If my resolve is strong, my body will follow through. I have to believe , just that

That's why, even though, I didn't finish the route today, I'm wasn't really injured =))) maybe I'm close to getting injured, but it didn't happen

It's... All in the mind. Somehow =)

Ahhhhhhh, HONESTLY!! I did feel unsatisifed not finishing the route! But my body was probably at it's limit =) But I'll keep pushing the limits from now onwards =)

It's honestly, a great feeling. To challenge yourself, day after day.

That's why I think climbing is a great sport, though I've been injured numerous times ^^

THANKS FOR READING! I admit I might have been a bit long winded, plus, I used a few climbing terms in which people might not understand XD XD

And I'm off ^^

p.s. I'll definitely conquer that route.

p.p.s do you have a strong resolve in your life? Think about it =)